»  Archives » 2010 » Sanctuary

We are hiding in the office, the only sanctuary we have to hide from the little 4 year old tyrant we call Todzilla. Her name is Meghan, my granddaughter. This office is by no means sound proof, but we have the means to distract ourselves from the ridiculous temper tantrum that has grown into a full blown war of wills. My husband and I each sit at our individual computers and alternately tsk or giggle at the battle going on upstairs between a four year old and her mother. This temper outburst at bedtime isn’t new, but it has escalated over the last 2 weeks. And it has begun take on the character of a dreaded nightly event.

We have one of those multi-generational households that have become pretty common . Along with Mommy, included in Todzilla’s domain is her 14 year old sister and her dad, whom she leads around by a firmly planted virtual ring in his nose. Dad will do almost anything to keep Toddy quiet. Truth be told, Daddy and sister have a lot of ownership in Toddy’s willfulness. But we won’t point any fingers here. PopPop and I try to stand on the sidelines with things of this nature.

Tonight is Day 3 of a concentrated effort on Mommy’s part to follow through on hints and tips she’s read from other parents who have suffered through the wrath of willful toddlers and some sage advice from the veteran Mommies (me, Aunts, the babysitter), to “simply” constantly re-enforce that ‘no means no’, just keep putting her back in her bed, don’t negotiate with her, try not to lose your cool, try putting her back in a crib, advice and suggestions ad-nauseum. Tonight, Daddy slipped out to stay out of the fray. He is no good at consistently non-negotiating and/or trying not to lose his cool. He would rather his pretty little girl have some type of diagnosable behavior disorder than accept the fact that she is a brat.

Yes, she is a brat. Meghan can wow you with her intelligence, she can spell her name, write most of the alphabet, count correctly to 15 and she comprehends the value of numbers to 10. She is a very bright child. But she is also disruptive and willful, mostly when Mom and Dad are around. Dinner is always an emotional treat, unless she’s having her demanded cereal, dry, no milk and then ‘requests’ her ice cream.

As the Grammy, I find all this crap tedious, the child is in control of the household. She knows where my threshold lies, and so, deals solely with her parents, as it should be, they are her parents, but she is dealing with them, not the other way around. I felt bad, for about 10 minutes. Then I hear the constant repetitive mantra that goes on nightly: Mommy, I want to ask you a question, Mommy, I want to ask you a question, Mommy, I want to ask you a question, Mommy, I want to ask you a question; Mommy answer me, Mommy answer me, Mommy A N S W E R me; I want Daddy, Daddy, Daddy, Daddy; I want Tayler, I want Tayler, Tayler, Tayler, Tayler, Tayler, Tayler; Mommy, I want to sleep in your room, P L E A S E, PLEASE, Mommy, PLEASE, Mommy, PLEASE, Mommy. I’ll spare you the rest of her repertoire. But all this is accompanied with a tantrum of banging on the wall and door of her bedroom. She’s 4.

The first few times she began this, I felt bad for the hysterical mess she could work herself up to, then one night in a weak moment of exhaustion, Mom said, ‘Just come lay down on my floor’. Todzilla’s response, “YYYEssss.” The crying and tears stopped like a light switch was thrown. From there it just got worse. She had won the battle and waged war on compliance and bedtime. Did I mention she is just 4?

Now it is 2 hours later since Mom has begun the Bedtime Battle, and Todzilla is asleep. This is a little progress. Last night’s battle lasted 2 ½ hours, and the night before that it was 3+ hours. Through the last three nights we’ve hidden in the sanctuary of the office. Tonight I wrote this recap. If tomorrow follows suit, I will probably be taking sanctuary again in my own little corner in my own little room.

We’re all tired.

Let’s hope she sleeps through the night. Tomorrow is another day.
Date » 25 November, 2020    Copyright © 2020 by JoanneCostantino.com Login :
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